Wednesday, May 30, 2007
Feist
Monday, May 28, 2007
Memorial Day
Yesterday morning, Jim and I were hanging back in bed and listening to a radio show from
But anyway, Jim enjoys it, too, so we sorta snuggle and talk and listen to this hokey radio show. And since it is Memorial Day weekend, good old John began the show with “Stars and Stripes, Forever.” Boy, I haven’t heard that song in quite a while. When it was over, he got up on his soapbox and basically, the essence of what he was saying was that patriotism has nothing to do with political affiliation. That this weekend, we should try to remember the people throughout our history who have fought for our freedom and to honor them and be grateful. That regardless of how we feel about what our leaders are doing at the moment, this is still our country and it’s the best country in the world.
Umm. Yeah….I mostly feel that way, too, I guess. Yes. Surely, there is a lot wrong here, but I mean, there is a lot wrong everywhere. I really don’t think I’d want to live anywhere else. And there are good things. People tend to forget about the good things. So I will take my buddy John’s advice and take a moment to thank and honor those men and women who have fought for the freedom we enjoy today. I will, however, continue to dream of a future in which all war will be unnecessary.
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
Reincarnation Station
Funny, I took the quiz once as myself. I answered as honestly as I could and I got one answer. I then went back and answered all the answers the exact same way, but as a man. Heh heh...as a woman, I came back on a higher level. Hmmm.....I wonder who wrote this thing....
Monday, May 21, 2007
Serious Woodworking Magazine...?
I mentioned it to some friends and they made me promise to post it. I don't think one needs to be from any particular generation or have any particular history to be able to laugh at this one!
"Stan always felt paranoid when in possession of a joint."
Saturday, May 19, 2007
Terra Naomi
Terra Naomi
Friday, May 18, 2007
Drunk Driving
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Judgements
Monday, May 14, 2007
Standing Women Report
I figured, oh well, so it will just be me. It was worth a try. It wasn't mine, but it was a good idea and I was going to see it through. I looked around, and a few minutes later, I noticed a small band of four women and a young boy walking along the boardwalk. I could hear their voices clearly. One of them said that "it's supposed to be behind Sears" and I knew I was not to be alone. I got up and approached them.
"You're here for the Standing Women?" I asked.
"Yes"
"Great! I thought I was going to be the only one!"
Introductions were made and they laid out their lunches on a picnic table. They had heard about it from someone who had emailed them from the city! That must have come from my original email blast. But they also saw it in the paper. One woman brought several bells to share.
On the stroke of 1:00pm (I used my cell phone for correct time), we rang the bells and I struck my chime, and we just stood in silence. I focused my thoughts on words that evoked feelings for me: peace, abundance, health, love, acceptance, friendship, respect...and also the planet enveloped in radiant white light. I was aware of the sun, the breeze, the birds, the "green" smell...that all helped to focus on the good stuff. I only checked the time once before the five minutes were up. When I did, I also looked up and saw our small band of women and one small boy just standing there, separate but together. I wasn't disappointed anymore. At 1:05, I struck my chime. My fellow standers rang their bells, and I turned and saw two other friends who had arrived a bit late. We all talked a little about what we had visioned. We talked about being moms and how we should do this again. I wonder if it had not been Mother's Day, if more people would have come. I wonder if this were more successful in more urban areas. There are still many people who don't "get" positive visualization and the power it can have.
In the end, I left the river that afternoon with a sense of both having done something positive, but also of having not done enough.
Saturday, May 05, 2007
For Jeanne
I was doing some spring cleaning today and happened upon a box of old stuff. I found this thing I wrote about my mom three months before she passed away. It was meant to be a tribute to her, one she could read before she died. And yes, I did give it to her. I’d forgotten all about it. I thought it was kind of synchronistic…me finding this now. Not only is Mother’s Day (May 13) approaching, but the anniversary of her death is, too. May 12. Next weekend is going to be rough, so if I’m going to do this, I better do it now…
Whenever I read a tribute to someone, it’s to someone who has died. The other night, I was driving to a rehearsal for a play I’m in and I started thinking about my mother’s situation. About how I was going to dedicate my performance in this play to her. And then I thought about writing a tribute to her before she dies. A way to express my gratitude and love. She was diagnosed as having inoperable cancer January of 1993. They gave her three to six months. Here it is, February of 1994 and Mom is still hanging in there. Am I surprised? Not really. I learned early on that in this struggle of life, I am a survivor. No matter what curve ball comes my way, now matter how awful it gets, I refuse to be beaten. Now I know where I got that quality from. From both my parents, actually. But I think mostly from Mom.
All my life, one thing was very clear to me about my parents. They were not only very much in love, but they were always there for each other. Most marriages have rough patches, but I know my parents had some abnormally difficult times. And they stuck with it because, I suppose, it was worth it to them. They have traveled that road for more than 40 years together. And now, as they are facing the imminent death of one of them, the “finite-ness” of their “couple-ness,” to coin a couple of words, it is ever more clear what a symbiotic relationship they have. And it is ever more clear the strength my mother holds within her.
I remember mom when I was a child. I remember how pretty she was and how gentle and kind and understanding she was. She has never failed to be there for me when I needed her. Now that I am a mother myself, I can say with some certainty that she would disagree with that. But if she were right, the times she failed were not important, because I have no memory of them.
I remember her comforting me when I was sick, or was in any kind of emotional turmoil. Some cruel children would make fun of my skinny, flat-chested adolescent body and painfully shy self. She kept assuring me that I was like her, a “late bloomer.” “Wait until you get a little older,” she’d say. “The boys won’t know what hit ‘em!” She was right, too. Oh, no, I didn’t turn out to be a bombshell or anything like that, but those hormones eventually did work their magic and I did eventually become a woman…wonder of wonders.
During my high school years, she dispensed wisdom, warmth and advice to many of my girlfriends, who found it easier to talk to her than to their own mothers. It was she who advised against fighting with my best friend over a boy. “Boys will come and go in your life, but good friends last a lifetime.” That struck a chord deep inside of me and I and I took that lesson to heart. She gave me my first inkling that there was a “sisterhood” among women, and I liked that. I am still friends with that 4th grade girl. It is rewarding and comforting to have someone who has known you for over 30 years and still calls you her friend.
You can always confide in her about anything and never feel you are being judged. She has always had a kind of healing aura, loving and nurturing, and completely selfless. She has a highly refined sense of empathy and has always been extra sensitive…you could say she is psychic. She is an “old soul,” as they say, and has been known to predict the future or read your mind.
Some people are givers and some are takers and some are in between. Mom is all giver. A little later in life, she finally learned to take a little, and my sister and brother and I cheer her on. Always a big supporter of her children’s creative side, now she delves more deeply into her own, which was always sort of simmering on the back burner. She makes ceramic figures and paints them. She has painted portraits of the whole family, but her favorite subjects are animals (especially young ones). Her landscapes are my favorite. There is a wistfulness in them, a dreaminess that makes me want to escape into them. And her poetry! It is because of her that all three of her children are so right-brained, I think.
When she was diagnosed as terminal, my sister and I flew from
My mother has a spirit that is very special. A rare combination of wisdom and innocence, of strength and fragility, that captures most everyone she meets. This world has been blessed by her presence. And I have been especially blessed to have her as my mother. Because much of what I like most about me comes from her. Just having a chance to know her and be loved by her is a gift unlike any other. I don’t know any woman who doesn’t have some complaint about their mother. You see endless magazine articles about the problems between mothers and daughters. I know how lucky I am to have Jeanne as my mother. I love you, Mom, and I’ll miss you. But I will carry you in my heart until we connect again. I know we will.